So I Took a Sabbatical: What I Learned/Should You Do It?
This is part 4 in a series of my sabbatical experience.
This post is meant to serve as the TL;DR for my sabbatical experience (links to the other posts are listed below) so that you can decide if taking a sabbatical is something you may want to do in the future (or just understand why the heck someone would take one in the first place).
Keep in mind, these are observations from my experience. Every person, every situation, is different. I hope that some of the lessons I learned will be valuable to someone looking to do something similar.
What I Learned
Fear is Relative
Some people are nature risk takers. I am not one of those people.
Give me the facts and I'll make a decision after some analysis. And in situations where facts are limited or cloudy?
That's scary.
Fear of the unknown is a natural reaction. However, it's often necessary to make decisions with limited information, backed by experience, intuition, and luck. CEOs often make important decisions with the limited information they have available, where a single choice could have a profound impact on a number of people.
If you don't make a decision, then you may pass on a favorable opportunity or end up in an analytic spiral, never going anywhere and simply saying Well, it's not that important. I'll move on to something else.
In these instances, fear, uncertainty, and doubt often cast a very long shadow.
But, if you take a step back, sometimes a decision isn't as scary as it seems. If you're making a choice between broccoli and carrots, the ramifications of that choice probably won't have a long lasting effect (assuming no dietary or allergy restrictions). Odds are, in a few hours, you'll be hungry again and be able to make a different choice later.
The point is to identify whether the choice you have in front of you will have long lasting and, possibly, irreversible consequences. You will have to decide if you can live with the consequences of your choice for that period of time.
The fear of making the decision is relative to how prepared you are for the consequences.
Oftentimes, you'll find that if you really think through the consequences, a lot of them aren't as immutable as you think. I'm not saying it will be easy, but situations are often sufficiently malleable that you won't end up permanently stuck.
When I made the decision to take time off from the corporate grind, I had to set aside my fear knowing that I was able to survive financially and develop a plan find income if the need arose. And while not everyone may have the luxury of being able to do so, there is nothing stopping you from taking a moment to really think about what you want in life and making a decision as to whether you want to do anything about it.
And then committing to do something about it. That commitment allows you to keep the fear at bay by attacking it with determination and resolve.
Identify What is Important to You
When I first sat back to really think about what I wanted, I looked back at what I've done.
What were the decisions that I made, when did I make them, and if I had to make those same choices, would I do it again?
It wasn't an easy exercise, but I found that what was important for me were the things I made time for. I found a way to rearrange my schedule to accommodate whatever it was that I felt was important to me. I found a way to express myself about something that I felt dearly about. I found a way to do something about what was important.
When I was younger, I made time to play video games. Back then, video games were important to me. I'd stay up late and go to school half asleep, because I felt the game time was more important than being completely coherent for calculus the next morning.
As I got older, that changed. My SO is important to me, so I make time for her whenever I can. The same with old friends and family that I don't get to see as often.
And the things that I knew were important that I ignored? Some of them ended up not being that important (learning how to ride a unicycle... don't ask), while others ended up coming back into the picture (focusing on health and fitness).
When you identify those things that are important to you, you'll make time for them. And what may be important today, may not be as important to you a month, a year, or two years from now. But if you stay honest with yourself, you'll be able to identify and keep what's important to you front and center.
Embrace Change
Humans are, generally, creatures of habit. Whenever there is a disruption to our "norm", it isn't uncommon to feel a little anxiety.
There are at least 2 things we know about change: 1) most everyone has the same feeling towards change and 2) our natural reaction to change is a good thing. This reaction sets our minds -- and our bodies -- down a path of problem solving: do we disengage from this situation or do we try something new (fight or flight, albeit much less dramatic).
You can fight the change curve by joining your fellow resistance fighters (which may be valid, because I, for one, refuse to live in a world without cookies.). However, resisting an inevitable change or something that you simply have no control over, will only prolong the amount of stress you'll feel and, eventually, wear you down.
Opening up to the change offers for new possibilities and challenges to over come. It offers us the chance to adapt to change, providing us with a new understanding and a new "norm" that will last until the next change comes... whether initiated by you or something else.
Embracing change isn't about yielding to every situation that may arise, but to tackle the challenge with an open mind to decide, for yourself, whether that change makes sense for you in the short, medium, and long term.
By keeping an open mind to accept that change will happen, you'll find that managing the anxiety isn't as daunting.
I kept an open mind when choosing to quit my corporate job. It was terrifying. It was a change I thought I wasn't prepared for, but in the end I chose to fully embrace it. Upon doing so, I was able to look past the scary "unknown" and focus on the problems that lay ahead and how I needed to tackle them.
Try Something New
Much like change, stepping outside of our comfort zone is another challenge we face. Whether it's something as simply as trying a new shortcut in your favorite program, getting a new haircut, or quitting your job to start your own company, trying something new is, well... new.
Trying something new offers the chance for you to fail. You may try something new and simply love it. But if you fail, you have the opportunity to learn from it and apply that knowledge later on.
The consequences of a failure scales with the nature of the risk (e.g. trying a new flavor of ice cream vs. skydiving), of course, but you know that in the end, you'll gain some insight as to whether it was a good decision or not (mint ice cream, great; leaping out of a perfectly good airplane for no reason... meh).
In a culture that seemingly both encourages and discourages you from trying new things by focusing on failure, it is understandable if there is some trepidation to put yourself "out there" and see what happens. But if for every failure you learn something new, eventually you'll fail a little less each time until you're succeeding more than you're failing.
And if you succeed the first time? Great. You'll have learned what worked and perhaps gain insight as to how to do it better next time.
When deciding whether to try something new, ask yourself: what do you want to learn from this? If you're sure on what you want to learn, how you can apply that knowledge later, and that it is within your means to try it, then by all means, give it a shot.
I tried a number of different things. Succeeded in some, failed in others. I know a lot more now than I did before I attempted anything.
Don't be afraid to fail, only be afraid if you learn nothing from the experience.
From Struggle Comes Satisfaction
If you look at some of the economic models within video games, there are often two paths that people can choose to take: make purchases to advance their progress or invest time in playing to improve your skill and earn your progress the old fashioned way.
What is the level of satisfaction between these two groups? At a high-level, those that "buy" their way to the top have a very short-lived period of satisfaction compared to those that earn their way by investing their time. Earning their way based on their own merit provided a greater sense of satisfaction and accomplishment.
While the above is a simple example in the video game world, the same can be said of other industries. You see this with entrepreneurs that spend an enormous amount of time building their business(es) and growing their brand or with professional athletes that spend years training to have a chance to compete against other like-minded individuals.
You often don't hear about their failures: the business plans that failed, the money lost, the aches & pains, the inability to beat that 50 meter lap time by a few seconds. We often only see the final product: a successful company or an olympic athlete.
Success is the reward, but the lasting satisfaction of having overcome numerous failures -- whether public or, most often, private -- is something that can only be achieved by going through a struggle and emerging on the other side.
We are all faced with difficult situations or trying times that may make us question our previous decisions; however, continuing to put in the effort to work through the adversity will only make success that much sweeter on the other end.
And in the case when that adversity cannot simply be overcome? Learn from it and direct that energy elsewhere.
Achieving something through determination, persistence, and grit will never get old.
You may be told you can't do it.
You may be told you shouldn't do it.
You may be called crazy.
People close to me told me all of those things when I told them I quit my job to pursue something else. I knew it wouldn't be easy. I knew I was terrified.
I'm not at the other side, yet. But so far, I'm digging the journey.
Should You Do It?
That is, ultimately, for you to decide.
Whether you take an extended period of time off or or not, commit a little bit of time each day to take a step back and evaluate where you are, where you'd like to be, and what you want that journey to look like.
It is all too common to get caught up in the daily grind, locked into a tunnel-vision of just "get through the day". Before you know it, weeks, months, and years go by.
Taking time for yourself is important so that you can maintain a clear perspective on the things that are going on around you.
I never invested in myself that way that I should've. This experience allowed me to do just that, and I feel immensely grateful for the opportunity and what I discovered about myself.